The single dumbest question I have ever been asked:
“Did you have surgery?”
By the x-ray technician. AFTER viewing a leg full of titanium bars and a few dozen screws.
So I have this set of history textbooks that were published in 1962, the second of which was reprinted within months of JFK’s death to reflect the premature expiration of his term — without so much as mentioning the premature expiration of JFK.
Now, I would totally expect a certain degree of white-washing from any textbook that employs such terminology as “the Negro,” and “coloreds,” while managing (quite impressively) to avoid use of the words ‘Nazi’ and ‘Jew’ in all three chapters about World War II. But you’d think they would at least acknowledge that the guy was dead. I mean, I wasn’t alive in 1963/4, but I think a President of the United States being assassinated would be kind of a big deal… not to mention one for the history books.
If you find yourself attracted to corpulent, heavily-tattooed, trailer-trash teen moms who love to smoke pot, then this blog is for you! Some of these luscious ladies eschew eyebrows, while others are more hirsute than the average bear. These cracker vixens are looking to party it up, and they aren’t about to let their kids get in the way! If you’re in search of a soul mate whose spelling is as liberal as her parenting philosophy — or if you’ve ever wondered what Jabba the Hutt might look like in the Slave Leia costume — then YOU OWE IT TO YOURSELF to click on the following link:
The 20 Most Bizarre Comments Left in the Past 10 Days
20. “It’s NOT over until God says its over! Jesus is in control.”
— L.C., $15.00
19. “Recently I have been studying the religion of Islam and I must say, part of the reason I’m donating here is not only because of my Christian beliefs, but also my new found respect for Islam”
— Righteous Christian, $20.00
18. “I hope she gets better. I know you have already reached your funding goal, but having Jahi McMath alive and well is the main goal.”
— S.S., $5.00
17. “Jahi is so strong she survived in spite of all this… do not believe for one minute its just machines keeping her alive, its also her will to live”
— L.T., $100.00
16. “God’s will and not Man’s will be done.”
— C.H., $20.00 (Because God is responsible for the ventilator.)
15. “I reeeeally hope she gets better :-)”
— A much friendlier C.H., $10.00
14. “I’m betraying for your sweet baby’s full recovery. I am in total agreement that she will pull through”
— K.M, $20.00, betraying the forces of darkness to stand among True Believers.
13. “This is the remarkable story of Pastor D.E. who was fatally injured in a car accident. During a dramatic journey to the hospital, he lost all life signs and was later pronounced dead. Afterwards God performed a miracle and raised him from the dead.”
— M.D., $20.00
12. “I hope this little girl recovers and returns to her regular life.”
— N.J., $20.00
11. “My brother… was on life support several years ago and I swore he responded when I talked and touched him. Because my brother did not have insurance the hospital said the same thing. ”
— C.C., $20.00 (Uh…?)
10. “Praying for you – The Chosen Few”
— The Chosen Few, $28.00
9. “I found this after your goal had been reached . Now let’s work on suing the doctors who attempted to murder your child and hide their incompetence.”
— H.L., $25.00
8. “We had a similar experience w/ the NYC hospital SYSTEM in a 3 year Battle!”
— T.P., $10.00 (WTF?!)
7. “I just want to tell you that the Lord told me to send you this amount of money.”
— C.L., $50.00
6. “Hospitals love to kill hope and faith.”
— S.L., $25.00 (an optimist)
5. “Do not let that band of murderers get their hands on your child’s body. They likely have an underhanded motive, like organ donation.”
— S.L., $5.00
4. “Take heart from the story of Z.D. in 2008, who seemed just as ‘dead’ for 48 DAYS, until his ‘nurse-cousin’ found that he still had reflexes and pretty soon he WALKED OUT of that hospital ALIVE. So can Jahi, and Jahi LIVES.”
— J.H., $10.00 (That “nurse-cousin” was in all likelihood Z.D.’s sister.)
3. “I was watching the jim backer show today a story wad told of a boy who had an accident and was ruled brain dead by many doctors. The mother bought a whole food powder that jim sells and was given this by iv. He recovered from his issue and proved the doctors wrong. I t is worth a try.”
— N.G., $20.00
2. “Jahi was very possibly poisoned by ‘carbon monoxide’ (sublethal/ low level CO poisoning) from the ‘anaestesia'”
— R.R., $30.00
1. “All the best for her full and speedy recovery. Keep faith in science.”
— J.A., $200.00
Thought of This:
Just further proof of the El-Aurians having visited Earth.
Facebook deleted Dakota Moore’s cover photo a couple days ago, which had essentially become a Toaster Steve thread. His Facebook itself is still up there, so the post which was second to the top has since been declared “New Thread.” Everything added to that one is also being automatically added to Buzzfeed.
From what I can tell, it seems to be just a handful of people keeping the Toaster Steve worship up, most notably one college-aged girl who is obsessed with the alleged rape accusations. There’s also some middle-aged guy who kinda looks like a child molester (not to stereotype) and is using this new “thread” to write personal essays about the women in his life and men’s rights. I suppose once you’ve become immortalized in Encyclopedia Dramatica, people tend to lose interest in you until you’re referenced in a future meme. I imagine he’ll regain some of the lost attention once he’s out of the hospital — if anyone allows him within fifty feet of an Internet connection, that is.