Yesterday someone accused me of pushing a socialist agenda because I posted a meme that wasn’t about socialism.
The day before I was a Russian bot because I tend to favor user pics of sentient-looking pastries.
Currently suffering a crisis of identity. Could I be some kind of robot left over from the cold war…?
Aaand a month after my leg was expected to have healed, it’s still only partially healed. (I should have had these X-rays a month ago, but I had to reschedule because of stuff with my kid.) The bottom part has fused with the cadaver bone, but the top part hasn’t fused at all. My doctor was stunned. We’re guessing it’s probably due to the Ehlers-Danlos, even though that tends to affect soft tissues more than bone. He said it’s possible I may never heal, and we’ll have to do a bone graft between my hip bone and the cadaver bone. Right now the plan is to give it another two months (while doing these bizarre electromagnetic therapies) and then schedule a bone graft if the x-rays don’t look any better.
On top of that, my knee keeps slipping out of the joint, perhaps half a dozen times per day. It all started after my kid accidentally kicked be under the table while my legs were crossed, although my doctor (same doc — orthopaedic oncologist) doesn’t think it’s really related. He says it’s likely due to the EDS as well, heightened by the fact that the joint is so damned atrophied. I reminded him that I have Type 1 EDS as opposed to Type 3 (in which joint subluxations are common), but he says he’s “not overly concerned” because the x-rays look good and it’s happening below the area he’d operated on. Well, I’m concerned. It hurts like a motherfuck every time it happens.
I was finally discharged today after three weeks in three different hospitals and one nursing home. I fell on February 15th, broke my femur completely IN HALF, and as a bonus was diagnosed with BONE CANCER. I go back in for another surgery on the 18th.
We live in a second-floor apartment, and my wheelchair is no match for the 19 steps it takes to get up there, so for the time being, my son and I will be staying with my parents.
Here’s a side-view of my right leg:
They sliced me open, scooped out a tumor the approximate size and shape of a facehugger, cut out the surrounding cartilage, bone, and muscle before stapling me back up.
The red dot you see near my Self-Made Man tattoo is from the screw they put in to keep my leg from falling completely apart, and the red dot to the right of the staples was used for post-op drainage — blood, lymphatic fluids, etc.
A set of x-rays taken of my lower body showed “significant deterioration” (their words — not mine) in both hips, so I have a feeling the bone scan will turn up even more fun stuff. 😦
My Grandmother has been hospitalized with heart failure, I’m in a nursing home, and my parents are basically raising my child.
It’s been twelve days since my hair has been washed, twelve days since I’ve last eaten, and I really, REALLY have to pee.
Now I find out that the nursing home doesn’t actually have a pharmacy at its disposal; it takes time to order and receive prescriptions.
And the nurse’s assistant spilled the contents of the bedpan all over my skirt AND the bed. She put a pad over the bed and said they’d change the sheets tomorrow. The skirt she threw in with my clean clothes.
And these motherfuckers are supposed to reteach me how to walk?
To top it all off, I have a roommate. More on that later, I’m sure.
Change isn’t easy. It’s difficult to say goodbye to those who have played a major role in your child’s upbringing and for whom you yourself have formed a very really attachment.
That being said, I’m adjusting to the new Wiggles better than I’d expected. Except for Simon, whom I’m pretty sure I once saw on a sex offender registry. And Lachlan, since I’ve yet to figure out exact why he’s there. (Sex appeal to the cougar moms, perhaps? Try again.)
So I suppose that really just leaves Emma, the new female Wiggle. I am surprisingly tolerant of her. Probably because she isn’t just some walking gimmick with titties geared towards capturing the attentions of a new generation of demasculinized preschoolers. She actually has some talent and has been touring with them for a while now — as Wags, Dorothy, and even a Wiggly dancer.
Anthony and Captain Feathersword are still there, and Greg, Jeff, and Murray have all made frequent cameos, so I suppose that is helping me cope. Just don’t expect Sam to make an appearance. He didn’t exactly part ways with the band farting rainbows.