A Fetus is Not a Dolly

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A woman suffers a second-trimester miscarriage. Sad, I know. But what she does with the fetus is astonishing.

She gives it to her daughters to play with.

You read that correctly. Her photography website features over half a dozen photographs of her two little girls holding, poking, and picking around at the remains of an extremely raw-looking human fetus. But that only accounts for a fraction of these fifty-some-odd dead fetus pictures, which feature the it posed in a wide variety of situations in which one would not normally think to find a human fetus — nor, for that matter, a non-human fetus.

Sitting Indian-style between Mommy’s hands, all dressed up in a blue robe with its own hands grasped in prayer, hatted yet otherwise naked, adorned in gold yet otherwise naked, getting its arms tugged at by a couple of preschoolers — is it any wonder the Daily Mail finds these pictures news-worthy?

In one of these pictures, you can see that someone has opened its mouth, which had in all other photographs appeared to be fused as shut as the eyelids. I’m really hoping it was the three-year-old, because the thought of Mom attempting to nurse this partially-formed fetus back to life is liable to trigger my PTSD, which came about after repeated exposure to details of the Jahi McMath case. Just as Jahi’s mother took offense to the word ‘corpse,’ this woman has a problem with the word ‘fetus.’

Look, I get it. Miscarriage can be a tragic thing, especially once you’ve reached your second trimester, when most women (myself included) will typically begin to think of their fetus as a baby. I’d never condemn someone for snapping a photograph or two, but what reason could someone possibly have to allow a child to handle a the remains of a human fetus — let alone multiple children who are barely old enough to understand the concept of birth, let alone death?

Well, according to Mom, she “needed to have the girls in to see their brother” because they had both been excited by the prospect of having a new baby brother. Perhaps she was hoping to creep the fuck out of them both so they’d STFU about baby brothers and allow Mom to sweep this one under the rug? (Not literally, of course… at least, I hope not.)

But family matters aside, what on earth would possess someone to upload over fifty pictures of a dead fetus for any non-4chan purpose? Mom answers that one too:

I wish that this hadn’t happened, but it did for a reason. Maybe that reason was to share with the world how perfect a baby which is legal to abort in many states really is.

It’s nice that she can see the silver lining to both her daughters playing “dolly” with her miscarriage, especially because that silver lining comes in the form of a political agenda.

What this woman does with her dead fetus is her business — just as it was before the pregnancy terminated. But to turn it into a poster fetus for the religious right strikes me as more than a little WTF Mombie?!


New Info on “Baby Sammy” Case

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I just stumbled across an update on the case of the Nikolayev baby, which was “snatched” from its parents by police officers and placed into CPS custody because the couple wanted a second opinion on a medical procedure.  Video footage of the baby being seized from its mother’s arms went viral, and people around the expressed their outrage by what appeared a flagrant display of CPS abuse of power.  The young couple was portrayed in the media as loving and attentive parents, deeply concerned with the needs of their sick baby and heartbroken by California CPS’ overreaching their authority by “illegally abducting” their child without so much as a court order.

As a mother, I’d found story especially chilling, particularly the implication that the State has the power to seize one’s child on a whim.  Like many, I reacted with anger and disgust towards California CPS, Sacramento police, and the hospital employees who’d “sicced” CPS on the poor family in the first place.

California CPS was almost universally condemned for their actions, ordered to return the infant, and subjected to extensive auditing.  At no point did it seem that CPS may have actually been justified in their course of action… until now.

You see, it turns out that there was more to this story than was ever reported in the media.  Due to privacy regulations, CPS has never been able to tell their side of the story or explain the rationale behind their decision to seize baby — nor were they able to address the factual distortions and allegations of conspiracy which spread through the press like wildfire.

But this past November, court documents were released which paint a substantially different picture of what really occurred in the case of baby Sammy Nikolayev.  It now appears that CPS may have been fully justified in their actions.

Directly from the medical records, dated March 27th:

Again, court docs:

Outraged yet?

Apparently the problem with the “second opinion” from Kaiser was that they either failed to fully understand the severity of this baby’s condition or else they were not made aware of certain facts — like that the baby had not been medicated for a full three weeks. I’m guessing it was a combination of both.

The Kaiser pediatrician who treated little Sammy expressed his full confidence that the five-month-old, eleven-pound, “hydrated-appearing,” baby would “gain weight/become fully hydrated” under the Nikolayevs’ care and instructed them to follow up with a pediatrician. Not a pediatric cardiologist, nor any of the specialists who had been working with the baby — just a regular, garden-variety pediatrician.

More from Reason.com:

So how did the Nikolayevs go from “competent and concerned” with Samuel’s care to being raided and having their baby removed within 24 hours? Court records reveal that the Sutter Memorial social worker, who had originally reported the case to CPS, didn’t trust the work done at Kaiser.

I’d say it’s pretty clear that CPS had some legitimate concerns, and that the baby may very well have been in imminent danger, which would legally justify CPS’s decision to act without a court order. Yet at this point the Reason article takes a surprisingly sharp and questionable turn, citing a letter to the parents from the pediatric cardiologist dated May 9th:

The Reason author believes that because the baby would not have been placed in imminent danger by Mom’s declining the surgery, CPS had no caused to act without a court order. I’d say that’s a pretty foolish conclusion to draw, one which completely disregards all the evidence presented in the first half of the article suggesting the baby was not being properly cared for. Whether or not the surgery was an emergency is in fact irrelevant; Sammy Nikolayev was removed from his parents’ custody due to allegations of severe neglect against his mother, not because the parents refused the operation.

Click here to read the full article from Reason.com

Mommyish Takes on RIE Parenting

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At last!  RIE Parenting makes its way over to Mommyish.  Naturally, I had to dig up and share a link to RegardingBaby.org:

This RIE blogger and self-proclaimed parenting specialist is fostering her niece, whose parents “couldn’t take care of her” — and apparently, neither can she.  She denies the baby toys, insists that tummy time is grossly disrespectful, and has video clips of the baby girl at 7 months behaving like a 2-month-old, and then again at 11.5 months just beginning to combat-crawl.  The baby is now seventeen months old and but appears to have the motor development of baby half that age.

What I don’t understand is how ALWAYS placing an infant onto its back (even to play!) and hindering its development is supposed to be respectful.  And denying an infant or toddler developmentally-appropriate toys (especially one who is already significantly delayed!) isn’t a “parenting philosophy” — it’s straightforward child neglect.

Here’s a clip of the baby “during an hour long play session in which R., who is five months old, peacefully and contentedly explored and manipulated a piece of wax paper, forever challenging the notion that babies get easily bored”:


EDIT: Someone on Mommyish has taken exception to my “picking on” Lisa (i.e., the blogger and daughter-in-law of RIE’s founder), arguing that there could be reasons behind the child’s developmental delays which have nothing to do with REI.  As I pointed out to her:

I’ve said it before about Attachment Parenting, and the same holds true for RIE: “If a baby has a developmental delay, that’s unfortunate.  If the delay happens as a result of poor parenting, even more so.  But if the delay is clearly caused by a parenting philosophy, that’s just unforgivable.”

WTF DID I JUST WATCH?!

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I’ve just witnessed the most disgusting and depraved ‘funny” baby video I have ever seen on YouTube.  It’s so bad that I cannot even bring myself to post the link.  Only 37 seconds long, it makes the shitty baby video seem heartwarmingly adorable by comparison.

It begins with a spread-eagled, presumably EC’d baby being “pooped” by a woman (presumably mom) over an open diaper.  An older child of perhaps two is clearly distressed by this sight, and her mother laughs and jokes as the kid freaks the fuck out.  The cameraman (I’m assuming Dad) can be heard teasing the toddler in the background.

Both parents are clearly fascinated by the infant’s defecation, and only the two-year-old’s reaction suggests an iota of intelligence.  The parents cheer the shitting baby on while the little girl cries and holds some sort of surgical mask over the lower half of her face.  Dad then begins snarkily cheering on the little girl, encouraging her to stare at her baby sister’s private parts as the poop works its way out of the infant’s ass.

The video ends with a hairy, overweight old man appearing in the doorway in nothing but a pair of boxer shorts.  I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if he’d paid for an hour with one (or both) of the children.

I’m not a fan of censorship, but I’m even LESS of a fan of children being victimized — especially by their own parents.  The baby may have been blissfully unaware of its surroundings, but the little girl was clearly being subjected to a sickening situation which her parental units seemed to find hilarious.  I reported the video to YouTube, though I’m sure it could be argued that it remains within their terms of service, as baby vag no longer seems to qualify as nudity these days — at least not on Facebook or Youtube.)

Why do people upload this shit?!  Do they find it cute?  Do they think it’s funny?  And don’t give me that, “We only put it up so Great Aunt Ethyl could enjoy these most-precious moments of our little snowflake’s existence.”  Aunt Ethyl doesn’t want to see that shit any more than the rest of us — unless the reason she can’t actually come and visit your snowflake Neveah (and witness these “precious moments” for herself) is that the State will not permit her within 50 yards of a child on account of her having previously viewed/filmed/directed/starred in “precious moments” of your first child (or someone else’s).

Besides, it doesn’t take uploading what is essentially child porn onto YouTube to keep in touch with friends and extended family.  That’s why we have Facebook — and STFU Parents.

NOTE: If you haven’t already bought Blair’s Book,  I highly recommended it as 101 on the world of parenting overshare via social media.  (There’s more to it than poop and baby vag; I promise.)